Monday, November 10, 2008

Can Money Get You Into Heaven?

Today is the anniversary of Martin Luther’s birthday.

Why is this important?

To get to the point: Martin Luther, considered the “Father of Protestantism,” is the guy who made it impossible for us to pay our way into heaven.

In 1517, he wrote “Disputation of Martin Luther on the Power and Efficacy of Indulgences.” Indulgences were payments made to the Roman Catholic Church in lieu of doing good works (or, in some cases, living a good life) to receive blessings…and…essentially…to get into heaven.

Luther believed that only God could declare a sinner righteous. So, he wrote that the Roman Catholic Church did not have the power to grant the ultimate Get Out of Jail card; and if they didn’t have the power in the first place, they sure couldn’t charge for it. He believed that living a life of good works and faith was what gets us into the ether of 24-hour buffets, no worries about money, and the Tar Heels winning EVERY football game by 30 points. Heaven!

Now, what in the name of all that is sacred on Monday does this have to do with having a Perfect Workday?

Here's what I think: There’s got to be a day when all the dopes who got us into the financial mess we are experiencing come to the realization that their golden parachutes won’t get them into the Eternal Easy. And, in their sleep, they will see the faces of all the people whose retirements have been aborted, whose homes have been foreclosed, and whose financial lives have been ruined.

If newspapers, TV stations, and news blogs REALLY want to help during this tough time they will start publishing and airing the names, pictures, and addresses of some of the politicians, bankers, hedgefund managers, and real estate moguls who got us into this mess.

My Perfect Monday Workday would start with Good Morning America on location in Times Square with a lineup of those folks grabbing their ankles and someone the size of Carolina Panther’s Defensive End Julius Peppers standing behind them with a canoe paddle.

Smack!!!!

Thank you, Sir…may I have another?

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