How do you really get to know people?
A recent story about Isaac “Biz” Stone, one of the founders of Twitter, notes that he often takes employees out for “beersonbiz.”
He said, “I think it’s a really big deal to meet people outside the context of something like a conference room or someplace where everything feels like formal talk.”
A few years ago Keith Ferazzi, the youngest person ever made a partner at Deloitte Consulting, wrote, Never Eat Alone. His concept was pretty much the same as Stone’s.
Richard Marcinko, former commander of Seal Team 6, one of America's prime counter-terrorists teams, used to take potential members of his team to bars, get’em drunk and get’em into a fight. He said it was a low-risk (having people shoot at you and try to kill you would be high-risk) way to see how they would act under pressure.
In relationships we often see a different side of people when we’re with them in unfamiliar settings or situations. You can take the country boy and put him in a city, or vice versa. You can watch how employees or significant others act when they are under pressure.
Getting a broader view of someone is a good thing. You might not like what you see right now, but aren’t you glad you knew it before you decided to take a long journey with them?
Sometimes you discover that you should be Two Ships That Pass in the Night.
Who in your life do you need to see in a different situation so you can get a more complete picture?